i've been procrastinating the whole week and i know i really neeeed to get down to doing something that i have to but it's so difficult to function right now. you know, my boyfriend is prolly the most awesome thing that has happened to me ever and i will never ever let anything happen to jeopardise what we have cos we all know who's the one always fucking things up. i don't wanna jinx it but really i am very very happy happy with where i am and whatever i have right now. he makes me happy and it's crazy but i miss him everyday. it's almost a year already but it still feels awesome. it's like i'm walking on freaking sunshine everyday. it's crazy the way i feel for him. i've never fallen for anyone this hard before. this feeeels so real it's insane :)

spent the whole day watching movies after movies. i foresee a very fat, long weekend. gaaahh! so i'm turning a year older in like less than 2 weeks. i wonder how i will be spending it. no expectations (sorry!) but my bf said he had planned something. it's just......another birthday. another day closer to death. haha. anyways i have been very lazy of late. i haven't met up with ANY of my friends. i guess they are busy with their own lives and i have been busy with mine. time really do change everything huh. i barely hear from them anymore i mean i can't be bothered to fix anything that is already broken. i really learnt that the hard way. what else is there to say. eventually everybody leaves you. someway somehow. on a totally different note, i have been offered a permanent position in citi. there. it seems real-er when i type it out. i don't know man. grateful? definitely yessss. maybe this is it. but there's this nagging feeling that if i don't do something else now, i'm gonna end up doing this job for the rest of my life. and that is gonna be painful.